FORGIVE or REVENGE ...

_...

_{The question is should we hold onto anger or forgive and let go..}

 _{When someone you care about hurts you, you can hold on to anger, resentment and thoughts of revenge, or you can embrace forgiveness and move forward. I do not know how you interpret 'forgiveness' but to me it's the letting go of grudges and bitterness and not attempting the act of revenge in any way and form. By embracing forgiveness, you can also embrace peace, hope, gratitude and joy.}

_{For many of us, the emotions holding the tightest grip on our hearts are disappointment, resentment, blame and anger, infidelity, lies, career sabotage, betrayal even certain life styles that may have caused us trauma, to family or loved ones. They place a stranglehold on our happiness, and the only person who can release them is you.}

_{Life will throw many obstacles onto our life path that will make us sad or disappointed at times. People will hurt you, let you down, collude and plot your downfall, and cause misery. Dealing positively with these obstacles is what makes the difference between them turning into worse states or being overcome. And the art to overcoming is FORGIVENESS.} 

_{How many times have you gone to bed plotting a revenge or woken up in the morning and while dressing, felt the pain that someone caused you and you tell the reflection in the mirror how you are going to teach them a lesson. How no one ever crosses you and gets away unpunished, or how this and how that ... they will know you are not to messed with! Allow me to invent a new name and call this kind of attitude 'big-small ego' syndrome.} 

_{Forgiveness is a choice that sets us free. It might not be a one-time choice and we may need to do it repeatedly but it's worth it!} 

_{Life takes us through different  twists and turns and personally I am constantly persuaded to practice the act of forgiveness.}

_{Forgiveness is very important for the development and growth of mankind.  Letting go of grudges and bitterness can make way for happiness, health and peace bringing with it plenty of health benefits, including improved relationships, decreased anxiety and stress, lower blood pressure, a lowered risk of depression, and stronger immune and heart health. It can also pave way for healthier relationships, spiritual growth and psychological well-being.} 

_{Letting go of negative emotions can often have a remarkable impact on the body.}

_{When I was struck down by polio I was despised by the community in my village who thought my condition was a result of witchcraft. My family was forced to flee our ancestral home after calls for my death for fear that I was a curse, a bad omen and a girl that brought shame to the tribal clan. The more I was told about the inhumane intentions and  acts of the villagers, the more I resented everyone from there and this transformed into a bitter anger that began to eat me up silently as I was growing up.}

_{So many times I wished the whole village would be wiped out or be punished somehow for the terrible way they had treated my family and me just because they saw I was different.} Bitterness and anger limited my possibilities, had an effect on me and I felt tied to the oppressors. 

_{It is natural to want revenge but now I insist forgiveness is the best way forward. By refusing to engage in the channel of conflict that your oppressor is trying to create, you frustrate their efforts and prevent them from achieving their objectives. You may feel disadvantaged but you unchain yourself from bad vibes and free yourself to accomplish to the full measure of your potential.} 

_{Let me tell you a story, you have probably heard a different version before;}

_{A snake penetrated into a carpentry workshop.  As it slipped, it passed over a saw and got slightly wounded. Suddenly, it turned and bit the saw, and biting the saw, the snake seriously got wounded in it's mouth! Then not understanding what was happening and thinking that the saw was attacking "him," it decided to roll around the saw to suffocate it with all its body by squeezing it with all its' strength, but it ended up being killed by the saw!!!} 

_{To me this is a clear demonstration of how holding on to anger can affect us and lead to destruction. I have used an example of the reaction of a snake because when I lost use of my limbs due to effects of polio, the villager called me a snake.}

_{-Sometimes we react in anger to hurt those who have harmed us, but we realise after all that we are hurting ourselves.} 

_{-In life it is better sometimes to ignore situations, ignore people, ignore their behaviors, their words.}

_{-Sometimes it is better not to react so as not to suffer consequences that can sometimes be deadly or harmful.}

_{-Do not let hate take over your life because love is stronger than anything.}

_{Before I pen off, let us pause and ask ourselves whether we have spend days and nights pondering on revenge or FORGIVENESS and WHY ???} 

_{Choose forgiveness not because you are weak, but don't let anger, resentment and bitterness take root in your life and rob you of your blessings.} 

_{Anger makes you small but forgiveness causes you to grow beyond what you are.} 

_{Forgiveness is the highest and most beautiful  form of love. Forgive those that are causing you hurt and distress, and in return you will receive untold peace and happiness. Forgiveness is a very tough act but let's just do it !! When you forgive, you break the chains that bind you from those that are hurting you and you can freely move on and re- write your stories of success and  blessings. Let us forgive those that have hurt us, not for them but for ourselves and then we get blessed with a life of beautiful adventures.} 

_{Finally, remember forgiveness  is a currency that we can mint for ourselves, and spend without fear of bankruptcy.}

_{Be wise and live healthy. God bless you all
 (big smile from me)}

Around the World in ..... 6 Days!!!

Jules Verne once wrote a book called,'Around the World in 80 Days'. Well, I've just done it in 6! Let me tell you how it happened.

On Friday 31st may, I was invited to attend a breakfast meeting with Sir Emeka Offor by Rotary International  and amongst the organizers were Judith Diment  and Nayan Patel who was particularly so keen for me to participate at the meeting. Sir Emeka is Rotary's Polio Ambassador in Nigeria and is totally committed to eradicating polio in Nigeria. I am not normally an early morning person but on this occasion I went along because I too want to see polio totally eradicated from the whole world and I was interested to hear what is being done. Also, as an Ambassador myself for the British Polio Fellowship I am always keen to hear the experiences of others. I spoke briefly about my own experience then we had a frank exchange of views and ideas. It was a very interesting meeting and I was glad I had made the effort to attend. I must admit my enthusiasm for another breakfast meeting the next day was full of curiosity when the invitation was given, but after discussing with Norman about looking after our son Tim when I returned home he said I should go because he understands my passion on and interest in any matters relating to polio. Well, he was right but not even in my wildest dreams could I ever have imagined what did happen. Sir Emeka invited me along with Manoj Soma and Gautam Lewis, who in my opinion is a encyclopaedia on crutches - as his special guests to attend the 105th Rotary International convention in Australia. I said I would love to. When is it? I was expecting him to say in a few weeks time but instead he said we would fly out with British Airways at 9.30 that night! Wow! I phoned Norman to ask him if I could go and he gave me his full support so I headed back to Harlow to pack.

After rushing to pack a few things I left again at 2.30pm saying a tearful farewell to my sweetheart son Tim, but he seemed more interested in playing with his mates so off I went. I've been to Australia once before so I knew I was in for a long flight. The crew on the plane were fantastic and did everything they could to make my journey a comfortable one. We had a brief stopover in Singapore and finally arrived in Sydney on Monday morning and were driven to our hotel, Holiday Inn in Old Harbour. I was totally exhausted but very excited had time to refresh and off we went to Sydney Olympic park to the rotary house of Friendship to view different stalls and meet Rotarians from all over the World. 

On Tuesday we went to the conference in the Olympic Park and I spoke at a breakfast meeting which was so humbling to be in the company of main donors of polio eradication. A bit overwhelming. It was nice to meet up again with Ade Adepitan, who shared his experience as a polio survivo then  Sir Emeka was given the opportunity to stand on the podium and make a special announcement - Yes, ladies and gentlemen he donated $ One million towards the eradication of Polio. Now this was overwhelming! . I also met a lot of Rotarians I've met down the years in my role as a public speaker spreading awareness of polio and related issues such as the late effects of polio and PPS (post polio sydrome)  that most polio survivors are struggling with. Again, that evening  I fell into bed exhausted but very happy. I have to admit I wasn't too happy when Norman and Tim rang to see how I was but he's very understanding and didn't take offence at my snappy response- he's used to it.

On Wednesday we paid a visit to the Rotary house of Friendship  and wandered around the numerous displays and stands. I was particularly intrigued by one that had an actual iron lung, something we never had in Kenya. I was also excited to see the End  Polio Now Torch that is due to go around the whole world. I can't wait to carry it when it arrives here in the UK. I had the immense privilege of carrying the Paralympic Torch in 2012 as a Paralympian but I will be even more proud to carry the Polio Torch because it is symbolic of the total eradication of polio from our world. Can't wait.


Most evenings on this amazing visit to Sydney, Sir Emeka did not wait  for us to be friendly - he showed us how by inviting us as a group to share dinner with himself and his outstanding staff. Sir Emeka is rich in love and generosity and he lives by example and his deeds clearly show that there is no exercise better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up and creating opportunities to enrich lives! I definitely would like to learn more from this man by the grace of God, how he does it - I suppose there isn't a fomula! 
 Thursday we began the long flight home and I finally got back home on Friday morning. The journey of a lifetime. I will use this blog to say a HUGE thank you to Sir Emeka Offor and his staff  both at Chrome Group and Sir Emeka Offor Foundation for providing me with the opportunity and I am really looking forward to working with them again in the near future.

So, jet lagged and back to reality. A busy week lies ahead. Speaking in the House of Commons on Tuesday, then doing a talk on fitness for the British polio Fellowship on Thursday.I am not rich in monetary terms but God is good to me and I thank him for all he lets me do and the great people He brings my way ...
And to sum up this blog let us remind our selves of the need to eradicate polio and the support the polio survivors who struggle with the late effects of the disease need!
Kindness is a language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
Wherever there is a human being,there is an opportunity for a kindness.
Instead of waiting for people to be friendly, show them how.

Love The One You're With.... I don't love polio

It's been quite a while since I last blogged but here I am. I really dislike winter because any bug or cold that is doing the rounds inevitably gets me. Thank God Spring has finally sprung, though we are now suffering from the 'Saharan Dust that makes breathing difficult. Hopefully it will be gone by the weekend. It's not pleasant that I am unable to train outdoors due to the 'bad air'.

Polio has almost been forgotten in the West but there are many survivors who are now struggling to live with the late effects of this awful condition. Still, life continues though with a little more difficulty, especially amongst the elder survivors.

A few weeks ago I was a guest at the British Polio Fellowship Indoor Championships held in Leicester. It was a great pleasure to be there and I was so glad I arrived early so I could have a try at the different sports. I really enjoyed wheelchair curling and bowls but I fell in love with wheelchair darts. I managed to score 120 with two darts so Phil Taylor watch out! I might take it up seriously when my racing career finally ends. It was fantastic to interact with the competitors, most of them in their 50's and 60's, and it was great to see the enthusiasm and competitive attitude they showed. This is a group of people who love themselves - they've accepted and made peace with who they are and not how they are defined. As a younger polio survivor I drew a lot of inspiration from them and I learned that actually we can never obtain peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves. We have to value our imperfections as much as our perfections! Anyway, it was lovely to present medals and see the pleasure on faces as they received their awards.

Statistically speaking there are around 120,000 polio survivors struggling with the late effects of polio in the UK. The British Polio Fellowship is working with the World Health Organisation to try and eradicate polio from the world. This year they are celebrating 75 years of the BPF  with different events and road shows, and you can find out more about the work they do or if you would like any kind of support related to polio - visit;  http://www.britishpolio.org.uk and a little bit about myself... http://www.annestrike.org 

I DON'T LOVE POLIO !!

International Day of Persons with Disabilities.

This day of observance was begun by the United Nations in 1992. It aims to promote an understanding of disability issues and mobilise support for the dignity, rights and well being for persons with disabilities. It also seeks to increase awareness of gains to be derived from the integration of persons with disabilities in every aspect of political, social, economic and cultural life. Very fine aims but what are the realities for the millions of people worldwide? Dismal if you are trying to live with a disability in a developing country where very often you are firmly placed at the very bottom of the society you aim to survive in. And what about here in the UK? Oh yes, we have accessible transport in most big towns and cities, and ramps into the majority of public buildings but we also have the disabled bearing the brunt of vicious cuts imposed by the current government, suffering the unfairness of Bedroom Tax, and others. Think on those things on this International Day of Persons with Disabilities. If you have to judge people living with disabilities, judge them based on what they can do, not on what they cannot. Judge them based on who they are, not who they aren't. Support their strengths and do not use their weakness to crush and destroy them to the bottom.  Otherwise, you are judging them based on your own shortcomings. 

 Africa has had enough of 'disability does not mean inability'. True inclusion of people labelled 'disabled' should involve more than just accessible toilets and ramps. People's attitudes need to change and start to recognise this group of people as full human beings. I totally agree with Emma Thompson that 'being labelled  'disabled' should not mean being disqualified from having access to EVERY aspect of life'. People who are differently abled such as myself have abilities too and this day should be about that, making sure that the society we live in is conducive to allow  these abilities to  blossom.  

No disability or dictionary out there is capable of clearly defining who we are as a person. It is only when we step out of that labelled box that our abilities begin to be fully recognised, giving us a much better definition of who we truly are as individuals. Today, I call upon every human race - Support us to break barriers, and to open doors, for an inclusive society for all. Let us take the dis out of disabled then we are able,take the cap away from handy and we are useful, take the label away and we are who we choose to become and dreams are turned into reality.

BLUE TUESDAY ......

There was a lawyer who was just waking up from  anaesthesia  after surgery, and his lovely wife was sitting by his bed side. His eyes fluttered open and he said, "You are beautiful" and then he fell asleep again. His wife had not heard him say that in a long time so she stayed by his side. A couple of minutes later his eyes fluttered open again and he said  "You are cute!" Well, the wife was disappointed because instead of  "beautiful" it was "cute." She said "What happened to 'beautiful"? His reply was "The drugs are wearing off!".

Life is full of surprises - I feel like I am on a long non-ending journey.At one point I thought I had 'arrived' but I'm still going. I do not want to be afraid of going slowly, but I think am afraid of standing still. I have always followed my heart and taken my brain with me, and prayed and trusted that it's gonna be ok.

I am having some down moment. My emotions are all over today. I am reminded of when I was growing up in Africa and as a young teenager I struggled with self image. My friends went on to wear short skirts and high heels while I was stuck in polio boots and long skirts to cover my legs. I was a keen reader and I discovered some trashy English romantic novels. I enjoyed reading about how the hero and heroine fell in love with each other. I liked the way they always lived happily ever after, but I often wondered if I would ever find that kind of perfect love because of my far from perfect body.

In fact when I read about the beautiful characters, I couldn't help wondering how someone would write about me. How could the flowery language be adapted to describe my callipers and crutches then in Africa and now as a wheelchair user living in the UK - I think it would take a literary genius to make my body sound appealing in a romantic book. I thought I had overgrown my past but some things come and shake us so hard that we feel like we are going backwards instead of moving forward. 

I am here in beautiful Switzerland training and competing in the most amazing atmosphere but I am struggling emotionally. I am only human and it's perfectly ok to feel this weak. I always look for something positive in each day but to be honest today I am having to look a bit harder.

I love the simple story of Cinderella, she meets her prince, gets married, has babies, and who knows - may be she went back to cleaning and cooking all day and may be the prince never took her to another ball,or may be she had servants and went to every ball. Life is a mystery, and I know our best stories will come from our struggles so I am not giving up at all!!!!!

'The Sessions'.

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A member of the British Polio Fellowship's view on The Sessions

None of the disabled friends of Anne Wafula Strike had ever heard of a 'sex surrogate', as described in this wonderful film – but many would like to try it

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• • Interview by Laura Barnett
  • The Guardian, Sunday 20 January 2013 19.44 GMT
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'I related to how Mark felt about his body' ... John Hawkes and Helen Hunt in The Sessions. Photograph: FoxSearch/Everett/Rex Features

When I heard a film had been made about sex and disability, I was worried. How could a film about a man who survived polio as a child, and who now wants to employ a "sex surrogate" to take his virginity, be anything other than gross? I was ready to cover my eyes – but I didn't need to. This is a wonderfully sensitive and beautifully acted film.

1. The Sessions
2. Production year: 2012
3. Country: USA
4. Cert (UK): 15
5. Runtime: 95 mins
6. Directors: Ben Lewin
7. Cast: Adam Arkin, Annika Marks, Helen Hunt, John Hawkes, Moon Bloodgood, William H Macy, William H. Macy
8. More on this film

1. In My Dreams I Dance (My Story)
2. by Anne Wafula
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4. Buy it from the Guardian bookshop

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1. Tell us what you think:Star-rate and review this book

Like Mark, who is played by John Hawkes, I contracted polio as a child. But he spends many hours in an iron lung and is near immobile, whereas I have never used one – I was born in Kenya and they didn't have them at the time – and I'm a Paralympic wheelchair racer. Nor had I ever heard of a sex surrogate. I've been asking disabled friends about it, and most of them haven't either. It's opened their eyes; some of them are saying they'd like to try it.

I could very much relate to the way Mark feels about his body. He's ashamed; at first, he can hardly bear for Cheryl (Helen Hunt) to touch him. When I was a teenager, I felt the same way: boys were starting to notice my friends, and I couldn't imagine anyone ever finding me sexy. Eventually, I just decided that I was beautiful the way I am. Mark goes through a very similar process.

There's a lovely moment when he says something like: "God must have a wicked sense of humour – he made me." I feel the same way. If you have any kind of religious belief, you learn to accept yourself – to understand that your disability is not a curse, but that God has made you in his own image.

I'd have liked to see the film look at post-polio syndrome [a condition that affects polio survivors later in life]. I have it, and many people don't even know it exists. But that's a small criticism. This is an important and educational film. I hope it will help people to understand polio better.

• Anne Wafula Strike's autobiography In My Dreams I Dance is available through the British Polio Fellowship (britishpolio.org.uk; 0800 018 0586). The Sessions is out now.

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  The Sessions: Helen Hunt, John Hawkes and William H Macy discuss sex on film - video
  The cast of a biopic about a polio survivor who used a sex surrogate to help him lose his virginity talk to Catherine Shoard
• William H Macy: 'Even the bad sex I've had was pretty good'
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• The Sessions – review
• Ben Lewin on The Sessions: 'You can reach women without brute force'

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